


Shall We Try Again?

by CrystalSilhouette



Category: Shall We Date?: Destiny Ninja
Genre: Blurb, Canon Rewrite, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-22 09:40:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9602120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrystalSilhouette/pseuds/CrystalSilhouette
Summary: This is basically my attempt at fleshing out my experience in this game. It was... disappointing. I'm not sure just how much was lost in translation, but I have a feeling that it wasn't all that far off.Personally, I felt the player's character was very flat and the interactions with the love interest seemed motivated by nothing other than pity. She was weak, and very unappealing in my view and I wanted to try and fill the void the game left me with. So, these were my own character/relationship building scenarios that played out more to my liking...These are merely random blurbs that were itching to get written.





	1. Ichi

**Author's Note:**

> Background:  
> For those whom haven't played this game, the player's character has been plunged into the obligatory bout of amnesia at the get-go. She's managed to lose herself in a forest amidst battle and is found by the chosen love interest. In my case, Mizuki. He is part of a clan of ninja called Genji. They are currently at war with a rival clan. Both of whom are after a collection of items known as The Sacred Treasures.
> 
> Scene Context:  
> [Aika] has met Mizuki as well as the rest of his ninja clan. As kind-hearted as their leader is, he appoints Mizuki her guardian for safety until she regains her memory - much to his great dislike. They have since had a run-in with a high ranking member of the rival clan and tousled. Here, they are battered but alive and on their way to find their companions.

The night was a fairly quiet one. However, when one is on high alert there is no shortage of rustling and obscure sounds in the distance, even on a peaceful evening. The sun had drifted beneath the distant horizon for what had felt like hours and it made moving through the brush much more difficult. The moon was a glorious pearl of white and gentle blue, but, even glimmering with all its might, could not break through the forest canopy enough to make light work of making our way out of danger by any means.

Mizuki had been his usual taciturn self through most of our trek. I had figured it was going to be a long walk back to camp with a fight waiting to happen between us and the others. It would be longer still with the atmosphere between ourselves staying as tense as it was. I wished I could understand what drove this man before me; why he seemed to carry such a great dislike for me, why he felt the need to make certain I knew my place. Perhaps then, I would have been able to find a foot hold and defend myself against his “looking after”. My train of thought caused me to grimace as I looked over to the shinobi leading me through the trees.

I felt myself tense in surprise when Kurodayu nickered. For a short moment I had lost myself in my storm of thoughts and had forgotten what our situation was. I slowed my steps to allow the stallion to move beside me, my foot falls regaining the caution in their placement once more.

“Are you tired, Kuro?” I reached to lightly stroke his muzzle. I hated to admit it to myself, but I was beginning to feel the miles beneath my feet too – at least, I hoped they were miles.

“Just a short distance more…” The curt voice made me roll my eyes in the dark. _A short distance_ … And what did that mean, exactly? I sighed softly and gave the horse a gentle pat on his broad, strong neck. “You heard the man.”

Without so much as a glance behind him, Mizuki lead on. Much to my quiet surprise, it truly was only a little longer before we came to a stop. It wasn’t much of a cleared area; trees still weaving their branches rather tightly into one another throughout the place, but they parted enough for a stream to rest and collect itself into a decent sized pond a couple meters wide. The gentle trickle of a small fall into the collection from above was soothing enough to allow me to forget the reason, once again, we had stumbled across such a respite.

“We should be fine to rest here for the night.” Mizuki stepped aside enough to allow me to lead Kurodayu closer to the water. The steed followed obediently, heading straight to drink after such a long journey. “We haven’t had anyone on our trail for a while so you can relax.” I glanced at man as he stepped up to stroke the beast slaking his thirst. As he did so, I noticed his other hand had been injured in the altercation, the palm of his sleeve and guard stained in blood. I sighed lightly to myself as I argued against my better judgment. _It’s what I can do in the least to try and repay for saving my life…_

Without a word, I moved to Mizuki and reached toward him, sliding the tanto he kept out of its sheath. I had seen him use it in battle for a brief moment and recalled where it rested. Had it not been for the kimono I wore being made out of silk, I quite possibly could have torn it with my teeth instead of having to borrow the blade. Mizuki moved back in surprise when I took his weapon from him without warning “Hey! Don’t-!!”

“Relax, _shinobi_.” I hissed the word a bit as I lifted my sleeve. I didn’t realize that words could actually leave a bitter taste in your mouth until then. “and show me your hand..”

That bout with Noritsune was hardly a scuffle. It would be a lie to say that I didn’t once think that one or both of us would end up dead. Even so, there was something slightly odd about that Heishi soldier. He was a determined warrior, but he did not seem too terribly out of his mind. I refused to give in to the enemy and had the wounds to prove my stance, (thinking about it now, I realized that my own clothes were colored with blood. With my mind racing a thousand thoughts a minute, I hardly seemed bothered by the sting of open flesh.) I felt entirely responsible for Mizuki’s hardship this time around. If I had just managed to stay one step ahead of Noritsune, if I could have just stayed that much ahead of the Heishi; there would have been no need to choose between our goals and myself.

“…It’s fine.” He stated blandly once more, realizing what it was I was intending to do. “I can tend to it.”

“Is that so?” I questioned, looking at him with a piqued brow, “And just how well can you tend it with only _one_ hand?” He stood silent for a moment, looking at me with his empty gaze, his face hidden behind his mask – not that it would have given any further clue to the sort of thoughts he had storming in his mind. “Now sit down and show me your hand…” I turned away at that, placing the fabric of my sleeve in my teeth to hold it taut as I sliced at the threads while stepping near the water.

Mizuki moved to a fallen log a few steps away, removing the cover of his mask before untying the string around his finger. I could hear his soft wince as he pulled the bloody fabric away from his palm while I dipped some of the bandaging I had made into the pond and wrung it out. The water felt cool on my skin. When I took my place on the log next to him I held out my hand for his. The injury was a deep one, but nothing that wouldn’t heal once properly cleaned and bandaged. There were strings of thread here and there from his sleeve as well as bits of dirt and brush. The man seemed to have little concern over the wound while traveling through the foliage. All the while I tended to him, I never lifted my eyes to him, though I could feel him watching as I worked.

The time passed in silence. I had no qualms with it. I didn’t know what I could possibly say to the man… other than thanking him, I suppose. I tossed the idea back and forth in my head for a moment or two as I wrapped his hand in dry bandaging. “Finished.”

He took his hand and turned it, examining my work. He clenched and released a fist gently, testing how tight the wrapping was. “Not bad for a noble..”

That was _it!_ How difficult was a simple ‘thank you’? I jumped to my feet; I couldn’t just let it all roll off my back any longer! “I never asked for this!” My sudden outburst seemed to have caught him off guard “I never asked to be your ward! And you can’t even be certain that I _am_ a noble! Kurodayu and you were all that I had when I opened my eyes to this world…” My voiced trailed and I stopped a moment, realizing what it was I was unintentionally saying, “Yet you treat me like I’m one of the enemy!” My rage grew hot inside me again. I wished then that I could find the words I needed but was left wanting. “… I never wished for any of this.” I turned away feeling the emotions in me bubbling up to an overwhelming amount. My yelling ebbed and my voice escaped me in a near whisper, “If it’s this troublesome for you, maybe you should have let me go the day you found me.”

“Hey!” Mizuki had stood then, moving over to turn me back abruptly by the shoulder. He stopped cold when he saw my face; trails of tears glistening in what moonlight found me. I couldn’t hold in my frustration anymore. He blinked, gathering himself again, “If I did, you could have died! You know that!”

“Then maybe that was the destiny slated for me!” I smacked away the hand that rested on my shoulder, “Maybe it would have been better for Yoshitsune and the Genji if I had fallen. At least I wouldn’t have been such a _burden_ to you.” I weighed the word heavily as I spoke it, turning away from him again. I wanted him to feel the sting of the word as I did every time he spat it at me.

“Well, I _didn’t_ leave you.” He retorted. I looked further away from him at that, “I was assigned to protect you, and I _will!_ ” the determination in his voice was strong, but I wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince me of his conviction or himself, “This is where you are now, so just accept the hand Fate has dealt to you.”

“Oh, like _you_?!” I sneered back at him, “I know you would be much happier if you didn’t have to constantly babysit me! Don’t lecture to me about accepting my fate!” I turned to walk away, I was sick of arguing and sick of his domineering attitude. I hadn’t so much as shifted my weight before he grabbed my wrist and pulled me back. I glared sharply at him, right into his eyes and hissed, “What would you care about the fate of a _noble_ , anyhow…?”

Clearly, I struck a chord then. His brows knitted tightly and his eyes narrowed on me and I could suddenly feel the grip on my arm tighten. He was angry. Good. I wanted him angry. I wanted him to feel the ire I did because of him. My arm began to hurt in his hand and I clenched my jaw and balled my hand into a fist in some sorry effort to resist him. I fixated on his eyes trying to burn the same hole in him that he was attempting to work on me. It hurt more and more every second, but I refused to give in. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of me telling him so. The one thing that seemed to help quell the pain was his eyes. Those uneven eyes. Even when he was irate they still seemed to glimmer peculiarly. They were vibrant; emerald and gold each in their own unique brilliance and, together in that fierce passion he seemed to carry within him, they were beautiful. Though, I would never think to tell him so.

I heard Kurodayo nicker again a short distance away, wandering some little ways off to graze in the twilight. My eyes never faltered. Neither did Mizuki’s. After another endless moment, he sighed deeply and his expression faded. That fire in him seemed to fizzle out and his grip on me was eased. As soon as I felt him release me, I wrenched my arm away. He watched me with his empty expression once more, waiting for what I was going to do next. I didn’t know. I had nowhere to go if I were to leave. No destination, no heading, no sense of where I even was… Except here, in the middle of a forest, waiting to be found – possibly killed, with a man I could barely tolerate. 

I winced inwardly and turned away. My blood ran hot and now that the adrenaline of bickering with the stupid ninja subsided just a bit, the pain of my own wounds began to sting once more. The bleeding had mostly stopped; the blood on my skin and clothes dried and clotted to stem it. I shuffled away from him, wanting space to breathe some calming air, and reached for my neck. I winced again finding it fairly sensitive still. I sighed heavily, fighting within me so as not to give into the disparaging weariness growing as the night aged. Things were becoming a bit overwhelming emotionally and the physical pain and fatigue on top of it all was hardly a help. I wanted very much to give in to despair and cry, I wanted to just release all the frustration and pent up emotions, but refused to allow myself to crumble before Mizuki and give him the satisfaction of seeing a poor little noble princess helplessly shedding crocodile tears.

I started slightly when I felt a hand on my good shoulder and looked over to find Mizuki’s plain expression. Without a word he shifted me toward him and suddenly I felt a cool pressure on my neck and winced at the stinging. “I’m… sorry.” There was nothing more he said, but when I looked up at him, his gold and emerald eyes spoke of their own sincere apology. I let go a soft sigh and turned my head away in silent acceptance of his apology. Mizuki reached for my chin and tilted my head upward slightly as I looked away, exposing the gash on my neck so that he could tend to it properly.


	2. Nii

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scene Context:  
> Furthering the story along, the clan and [Aika] have boarded a ship to be on their merry way with the Sacred Treasures, when, of course, they are besieged by their rival clan. As the scuffle gets underway, the treasures are lost over the side of the vessel and Mizuki had dove in after them. The group believes he and the treasures to be lost after spending the remainder of the day in search of him. [Aika] refuses to accept the reality of him having drown and goes on her own to seek him out one last time.

I called out his name, feeling the anxiety within me and fighting to hide it from my voice. I choked back tears of utter relief when he finally stirred. He was alive! Oh, thank God, he was alive! He coughed as he began to shift, his body realizing that it wasn't fodder for bottom feeding fish. I reached to him, kneeling in the sand beside him and gently helped the shinobi to sit upright. I brushed the sand off his back and shoulders after I yanked the mask off his face so he could catch his breath properly. "Are you alright?"

"Yes." a curtly brisk answer. Oh, yes, he was just fine. He sat for a bit, surveying the surroundings, attempting to regain his bearings. As Headstrong as ever, Mizuki pushed to his feet not long afterward. Ever the cold, calculating, stonewalled warrior, he showed no sign of any injury or fatigue from his earlier ordeal. "Where is everyone?"

I felt another prick of anxiety at the question. I had been so preoccupied with looking for Mizuki, hoping - praying - he was alright, I had completely been amiss to the idea of me out searching for him without anyone else and what sort of light that would put me in. "I… came alone." my tone was sheepishly quiet. He looked at me then, a patronizing brow piqued as he did. "Worried for me?"

"I just..." I stumbled. He had caught me off-guard. I hadn't expected him to even think about any concern I would have over him. It never seemed to be of any interest of his before. "I've just grown so used to having you breathe down my neck all the time.." I could feel his eyes on me as I scrambled for some valid sounding reason, "When I saw you go over and not surface... I.." my voice trailed off when I couldn't find anything else but the truth; not wanting to say it outright, I fought to finish my words. "I couldn't-"

"I heard something." he cut me off, much to my heavy relief, his eyes shifting from me to the deceptively calm water, "Out there. I was tired and ready to let go. I was fighting so hard... With only one free hand it was difficult." a flash in my mind recalled the treasures scattered on the beach, then clutched tightly in his arms as he struggled, "but then I heard something. A voice calling to me... Telling me to keep going." I looked out to the sea, trying not to think of Mizuki simply giving up and being lost to the depths. He looked at me then, "It was you; your voice called to me."

I looked back at him with the best empty expression I could muster, my mind racing in surprise to hear it. "'Don't give up. Don't you _dare_ quit.' …It was enough." he stood quiet a moment, his eyes focused again on the blue waters; "It kept me going." He looked to me again, his expression difficult to discern. But the color of his eyes flared in the young morning sunrise. The vibrancy of them was captivating, entrancing me with the way they danced with just the smallest amount of light breaking the horizon. I realized then, just how powerless I was against his dual-colored eyes.

I knelt there in the sand in my stunned silence, not sure what to say in reply. I remember screaming those exact words in my mind as all of us stood on that boat searching frantically for any sign of Mizuki to break the surface of the raging waters. I wanted to cry them out, but I had never found my voice. Before I knew it, there was no question Mizuki had been swept off. I couldn't believe that, somehow, he had heard me. I had to admit, though, I was overjoyed that he had pulled through - not _aloud_ of course. There was, however, something I needed to say.

“Mizuki…” He was the first I wanted to know, “My memories. They’ve come back to me.”

The shinobi turned to me with surprise in his eyes.

“Aika?” he was always perceptive, “Why don’t you seem pleased about it?”

I sighed deeply and began to recount the day Mizuki had found me. That morning the fighting trickled into the capitol, forcing me out of my home and ripping my family from my life. I told him of how I had fallen from my horse trying to ride as far and fast as I could and bashed my head hard enough to push these sad traumas from my mind. With a heavy sigh I forced myself to accept the truth. It was a constant subject of battle and, as it turned out, I had lost; so incredibly thoroughly. It was a swallowing emptiness to not know your origins or who you truly were. That void of self was consuming and when one lived in a time where your heritage defined you, there is little to salve that wound. I was happy to know my parents once again, but it was a double-edged sword to know I was a noble birth. _I really am a spoiled noble._ It was a sour truth to swallow. I had fought Mizuki so adamantly about the possibility of not being one, getting so irritated that he would use such a thing against me. I grimaced silently as I let that reality burn in.

“So…” I cleared my throat and sighed deeply, saving my mental turmoil for a moment I had to myself, “I guess you win.”

“…Aika…” I looked at him as he spoke my name. It was a sharp cut to my heart when I looked up at him and realized I almost dreaded seeing his face. Had I really come to fear being a noble because of him? Did I truly care what he thought about me? As one of title and status? When I met his heterochromatic eyes, I saw sadness in them. His brow was furrowed and his shoulders seemed to have slumped. “I’m…” He couldn’t seem to bring himself to say whatever was on his mind. Gloat, perhaps? Some snide comment about how obvious it was I was of noble blood this whole time? My eyes had wandered away from him as I rooted through possible things he might have had to say. I didn’t notice Mizuki move over to me until he dropped to his knees at my side. I gave him a questioning look just before he pulled me into his arms. “M-Mizu…” My words were muffled by the cool wet folds of his clothes. “It must be difficult for you… Finding your family and losing them all at once.” I tried desperately to suppress the sob. It welled within me, but I managed to keep it held back to save face. But hearing him say it out loud broke my resolve.

In a simple flash of light, it was exactly as he said. Only, it was the third time I had lost them. Difficult did not even begin to describe the way I felt at that moment. I let out cries, stifling them as best I could. I was angry with myself on top of it all for breaking down in front of Mizuki, of all people. But oddly, I was also relieved of that fact as well. As my emotions poured out of me, I felt my guardian’s arms clutch my tighter and I didn’t want them to ever let go. I clutched at the fabric of his clothes and buried my face into his chest. I was shattered and my heart was wrenched in so many directions that, when I broke, I lost all composure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just for clarification/spoiler: [Aika] is a shinto priestess whose family was tasked with caring for the Sacred Treasures.


	3. San

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scene Context:  
> At this point in the game, the leader of the Genji has established his stance on changing life for the better and has obviously made some enemies while carrying his ideals across the lands on their journey. They have since settled in their leader's village to regroup and plan their next move when they are attacked by assassins. The battle is hard won and none escaped unscathed.
> 
> This moment is not canon to the game, but a scene of my own particular character developing.

The night was… _eventful_ , to say the very least. Poor Yoshitsune was already struggling with matters of war and peace and now, to know that his brother was against him – on top of that, _assassins._ I had no shortage of sympathy for him. I sighed deeply feeling very humbled by his situation. I felt broken and torn to pieces about the things I had suffered through, and yet, the artifacts were recovered and in safe hands, I was on the road to restoring my family and their honor, and I was safe, healthy, and determined to keep to my father’s final wishes. I didn’t have to continue to fight a war. The man held up very well, so poised and composed in it all. I admired him greatly. If anyone could make such dreams as his come true, it was himself. I had no doubts about it.

I grimaced a bit as I shifted to stand. I felt sore and achy all over. I didn’t think I had taken such a hard tumble during all the excitement, but I guess that when you don’t spend much time on the battlefield you’re just a little frailer to the physical battering. My shoulder throbbed especially hard after landing on those stones. I reached to rub it as I shuffled down the quiet halls. I had a sinking feeling that all of this would feel twice as painful tomorrow as it did now. Ugh, and it hurt so much to walk.

I stopped before an open door, looking into the room filled with a clash of pale blue moonlight and caressingly warm ambers from a lit candle, both shades dancing across Mizuki’s quiet figure, leaned back against the wall as he examined and redressed his bandaging.

“Do any of you shinobi make it through a day without bleeding?” I asked rhetorically as I slowly stepped in, albeit a little brash to invite myself.

“Aika!” Mizuki clearly started, he quickly moved to stand on his feet. But halfway up, he cringed and doubled over onto a knee a hand reaching over to his side over the bandages. Quickly, I went to his side and reached to help him. Without a word or even a look, he raised a hand to stop me. _Stubborn_. Once he was on his feet and he heaved a burdened sigh. It was obvious he was in more pain that I was – my skin was still in one piece, after all. “Is – ngh! Is something the matter?” It was a labored question, but few but those that knew him would notice it. There was no sign of his straining in that vacant expression.

“No.” I answered flatly. I sighed mentally; there wasn’t really any need to be so defensive. He was acting out of pride, and that, at the very least, was normal for Mizuki. “I only came to see if you were doing well.” I reached to take his bandaged hand from his side and turned it in my own, examining his wrist for swelling or any bleeding. “A little more battered than usual, but you seem to be alright.” He nodded quietly in response.

That brute Rengoku was unbelievably strong. All the shinobi struggled with that beast while Shizuka made very little else any easier. Poor Mizuki had dislocated a shoulder trying to keep hold of that bludgeon with his sickle and chain. Afterward, though I was told to stay out of the way, I intervened when Rengoku had Mizuki pinned. None of the others would have been able to reach Mizuki in time after being beaten and knocked back. Even through all the wounds he sustained, Rengoku was a force to be reckoned with. That last swing with his biwa and Rengoku could have crushed Mizuki’s skull. With Shizuka knocked out, I managed to grab one of the blades from her fan and rush to shove it into the man’s side as he lifted his lute. With a grunt, he stopped and turned to me much quicker than I had anticipated. With an easy swing of his arm I was knocked back hard onto the ground. Rengoku pulled the blade from his side and swung at Mizuki whom, by then, had clamored to his feet. Unfortunately, still shaken by the last blow, he wasn’t quite quick enough to evade the swing and the edge caught his left side, slicing him open.

Luckily by that moment, Hyuga and the others had come to their own feet and re-entered the fray. A wild swing from Rengoku’s biwa kicked up half the cobblestones on the path and the debris was a heavy assault on everyone. Before he could swing another Mizuki’s chain wrapped around it once again. There was a hard yank and the assassin wrenched the chain free of both he and Mizuki, the shinobi grabbing his wrist at the strength it was twisted. It took several more eternal moments before the gigantic man collapsed of blood loss. There was no way to thank the gods enough for it…

“And you?” Mizuki’s voice pulled me from my recount. “Are you well?” I gave him my own nod and he sighed heavily. “I asked you to stay put. The man could have easily killed you, Aika. To throw yourself into the middle of everything that way –“

My brows knitted as he began to scold me. It was never going to change, was it? No matter what it was I did, it would always be meddlesome or complicate whatever it was he was trying to take a handle on.  I don’t know what it was I was expecting when I decided to see the stupid man. I was honestly starting to get a little irritated with myself for even being the slightest bit surprised.

“Stop! Just stop it!” I didn’t want to hear any more of what he had to say, “I don’t have to stand here and take this!”

Mizuki’s brows piqued as I burst out, turning to head to the door. It hurt to move still, perhaps a bit more since I was still for a moment. Though, it wasn’t as much of a pang as when everything in my body suddenly halted. I looked back and saw Mizuki had grabbed my wrist before I could take my leave of him. “Just listen-“ I was tired of just swallowing my pride every time he had something to say about my noble blood or how I should obey his _every command_ as a woman and letting it all fester until it all boiled over. I was sick of it! This time, I would show him just how much. Before he could sputter another word, I turned on the ball of my foot and swung at him with my free hand. He deserved a slap in the face. I had wanted to do it several times, but thought better of it given circumstances. Now I was at my wits end. I was ready to give my life for him. Without even a second thought, I saw an opportunity to help him and took it. The last thing I wanted was for him to perish in that damn fight – or any. But what thanks do I get? Another lecture. Did he even notice? Did he even understand? Did Mizuki even truly care at all? I was his ward and that was the end of it. As long as I was alive and not some carcass to clean up off the ground, that’s all he cared about.

I drew in a sharp gasp when he caught my arm. His brow twitched a bit when he did so, suffering from the strain on his injured wrist. This was the first time our squabbles escalated to the physical and suddenly I was afraid of how he would answer my move to strike him. I looked up at him, trying to read anything from his expression, trying to glean _anything_ from his eyes about what he would do. I twisted my wrists, trying to get free from his grasp. “Mi-“ My actions were quickly subjugated when Mizuki pulled me in. Any objections I could have mustered were stifled by his lips. _…Why?_ My eyes went wide with surprise. Why couldn’t I ever just sever myself from him? It was constantly push and pull and I was tired of it. This was my breaking point and the next move he pulled was this.

His kiss was even as assertive as his personality. But it was only for that first moment. Once I realized this was his retaliation, my shoulders relaxed and, in turn, so did his grip on me. His lips were soft… I hated that. I didn’t need more reason to give into him. It was enough I was fighting him outright; I didn’t need to lose the battle inside me over him too. It was too much. I felt my eyes begin to burn with tears. _Ah, perfect. Just perfect._ My foundation was crumbling and they were quick to water once I submitted. It was barely a second, though it felt so much longer, and Mizuki broke away and my eyes were laid upon by his own mesmerizing mismatched set. His brows furrowed when he looked at me and saw as a tear ran down the side of my face. He reached to wipe it away with a light touch.

“I’m not... Saying what you think.” He breathed softly. “Thank you… I don’t believe I would be here now if not for you. For you to risk yourself that way… Thank you, Aika.”

He leaned in once more and I felt a second tear fall as my eyes closed. The second kiss was even more delicate and I looked away after. I didn’t want to see his face. I couldn’t give into him. I wouldn’t allow myself even though I wanted to more and more after each kiss.

“I…” I shifted and gently pushed away from him, “I should go.”

I could feel the disappointment washing over Mizuki as I walked toward the door. But now wasn’t right. Now wasn’t the time. If, perhaps, he was truly honest about these actions then maybe more would come of it. But I would not be a woman to his whim. I was not a blade of grass that would bend to the sway of the wind. If I stayed with him any longer, however, I would have been soon enough. I’m certain the man felt this was a rejection, and it may have been – in a certain sense, but not the kind I’m sure he was imagining. I stopped at the door and turned to look at the dejected man, grasping at his broken body once again, my hand resting on the frame of the paper door.

“Goodnight… Mizuki.” It was no smile, but I had hope beyond all else, he understood.


	4. Yon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Scene Context:  
> At this point, my rewrite has lost its solid timeline. It has been quite some time since I actually played it as well as when I first wrote these scenes out of necessity for my own sanity. Only note that it's a good while after the previous chapter. Little else is needed for understanding.

Finally. It was too long since I had a proper bath and the promise of a soft futon to lay upon. I was silently thrilled at the prospects of the evening. I hadn't felt so relaxed in quite a while, all the excitement that had happened in the past few months were certainly something that I wouldn't trade for the world. It was an experience that I know helped me to grow and find myself in a different way, even after I had regained my memories and my purpose. It felt good, finally getting a chance to settle and consider all that happened. Shrine... the thought crossed my mind when I revisited the last moments I had with my parents. The recollection stabbed at me quite sharply and suddenly I was overwhelmed with somber longing. I felt the slow burn of threatening tears in my eyes. In a deep breath I forced myself to will away that sadness. I missed them, but I wanted a true sort of peace to come through the valleys before I would allow myself to become washed over with that sorrow and mourn for them properly.

  
I ran my fingers through my loose hair. It was nearly dry. Once it was, I would be able to lay in that beckoning futon and get a long awaited night of real sleep since we stopped traveling. The hard dirt ground was fine for some, but I knew I wouldn't be able to last much longer if that was all I had. Wow… There was that noble pampering again. But perhaps I was allowed that much. I had grown to be a bit less delicate than the average noblewoman. I did spend some time sleeping on the dirt ground and I had helped in the heat of battle. I wouldn't go calling myself a warrior or anything like that, but I contribute. I gave myself a small nod as I tightened the obi on my light, evening kimono. I always loved dressing down for the evening. I always felt like the weight of the day was lifted when the days clothing is shed.

  
How so much had changed. I sighed softly and began to make my way from my mirror to my futon. Just as I did so, I heard something shift in the shadows of my room. I slowed a bit, moving just a little bit more cautiously. I didn't think there was any way someone would be able to sneak in with the number of shinobi in the area. But there was always that incredibly slim chance... As I took a step forward, I scanned the far side of the room, careful to try and catch any slight bit of movement in the dark.

  
"Your perception is highly improved." I jumped at the voice right next to me. I turned swiftly in its direction and saw Mizuki step out into a stream of evening light breaking into the room. Dressed lightly in contrast to his usual robes, he wore a simple suteteko beneath a short yukata, though, he still wore that mask of his, leaving his eyes to shine all the brighter.

  
"Mizuki!" I huffed, "Look, I know you're shinobi, but it's really ok to knock on a door once in a while. I swear it won't make you any less of a ninja." I caught a smile in his eyes then; that subtle shift accompanied by that particular gleam even though half his face was hidden.

 

"I... Can't.." he spoke finally, the smile gone and his voice low.

  
"Trust me, it's easy." I answered lightly, "Here. I'll show you!" I pointed toward the door of my room and before I could shift my weight to walk over and demonstrate, he spoke again.

  
"I can’t... Stop thinking about you..." I looked at him over my shoulder, not sure if I heard right. "Everything I do, every decision I make... It's all based on you. I can't do anything without making sure I know where that would leave you. You’ve… infected me." he never looked at me as he explained. But, even in the gentle deep blue of the night, I could see a soft blush on his face, "I can't stop watching you anymore. I can't stop wanting to be near you, to... Touch you."

  
All those times he had placed his hand on my shoulder, brushed against me, or meet his gaze with mine did not go unnoticed. Since the first time he had done it after the night Yoshitune was attacked, the night of Mizuki’s kiss, I was always aware of him. I had caught myself several times looking over to him when I knew he turned away. I didn't want to admit to myself that I could have possibly fallen for the damned man that had tormented me so from the start - even though I already knew I had. Finally, he looked to me and I started, not really sure why, outside of not really knowing what to do or say. "Aika..." he reached to me, taking my shoulders gently, "It breaks me inside to think that you would push me away again. But…” His voice hitched ever so slightly, “I… Want you..."

  
I could feel my own color turning warm as I looked up at him. His brows had furrowed apprehensively, almost as though he was afraid I would reject him outright. Had he always been this endearing? If he could admit to it, I supposed I should as well. In his gentle grasp, I reached a hand up to gently pull his mask away, using it as means to an end. I shifted to the balls of my feet and closed my eyes as I felt his soft lips against my own, tugging him in by the fabric. It wasn't the first time we had kissed. I thought it kind of funny that, though we had done so before, it was now we openly admitted to feeling for one another and still this kiss felt new.  
"I'm the same." I whispered as we broke away, "I want you too."

  
Mizuki said nothing as he looked at me again for a moment, his eyes darting all over my face reading me carefully, before slipping his arms around me and drawing me into him. My hands shifted onto his chest as I began to learn the true taste of his kiss. Fuller, more passionate than any of those we shared before. His scent was light. There was a soft hint of sea air about him. It was crisp and refreshing and I was completely submerged by it. My fingers gripped his yukata lightly, pulling closer to drown further in that fragrance.


End file.
